What's wrong with my penis?

I have a serious problem? My penis is so large, I have to toss
it over my shoudler where it hangs down my back. I try covering
it and be discreet, but ladies will come up and ask if they
can see my pet python. I have been having a hard time finding
work, because of this. People look at me wierdly when they
see my python "attacking" my penis, when I have to admit
to them that it is my penis. Does anyone else have this problem
and do you have any suggestions? I'd really appreciate
it.

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